2007-04-25 - 5:07 a.m.

A big ol� failure � whilst also being a winner.

Ok, so I was up in Southampton Wednesday through to Saturday. I was due to hava coffee with Waish when I arrived. All this went ahead. I was meant to have the discussion laid out in my previous post. However not only had I largely bottled it by the time I went to Soton I also found, during talks with her, that she was actually still with Patrick. So all in all it wasn�t going to happen. However she did also mention that she was going to be single in about 24 hours, as she�d not see Patrick again in Southampton and that was meant to be the end as she didn�t see it long term.

So that was that, I was left a little confused regarding the signals I�d been getting and carried on with my life. Went out Thursday and towards the end of the evening texted her to check she was now single. She indeed was and was in town. Unfortunately she left her venue about 20 min after I�d left mine and started walking back to Charlie�s. However we�d suggested going to the Soul Cellar the following night. During the day a number of people dropped out and potentially it was going to be just Waish and myself. Now I was sorely tempted, but Charlie had expressed an urge to go out but only as far as the Hobbit. So I decided to go there and invite a posse instead. She did invite me to stay at the Hobbit once Jade and Charlie had gone and catch a cab back with her, but decided instead to leave with us. So we said another tense goodbye and that leads us to now.

Today � Monday. I left a couple of somewhat flirty responses to a few notes she�d put over the last few days on FB. Then in the late afternoon I got a text from Cotter saying that it was so obvious Waish wanted me. I replied saying I had considered it but that there was the obvious issues about location. He said I should stop being stupid and take life as it comes. I said he was probably right and that as always I just think too much and make things appear bad. He replied with �Thinking is the poor man�s doing.� So I thought some more. Ha Ha! I was contemplating talking to her on Thursday evening when I return to Soton, following a similar path to the original idea. However I figured that if she decided she wanted to run with something then it�d be a big hassle re. Charlie�s. So after a lot of tossing and turning I decided to ring her and well, I�m pretty much in a relationship now! :D. I shall stay at her place when I�m up and see how things pan out.

So things need doing. I need to thank Charlie for his offer of accommodation but admit I have a better offer. I�m going to ring Shez tomorrow too and just let her know. Also I may try and get her to convince Heather to share her room at Infest and then Waish and myself can book another one. May/Will as long as she�s OK with it all.

I�ll also point out that it actually looks more likely I�ll be offered the Finland job :s. I will take it as long as the wage is reasonable, by the fact it�s a job offer and a great opportunity.

And where I thought discussing it with Waish would let me get some sleep, it really hasn�t. Hence this entry as then it�s dumped and Hopefully I can be at peace.

This is somewhat out of date I will write another tonight.

Hit 88mph Marty - The Future????