2009-04-07 - 4:30 p.m.

I've been avoiding putting this post in for quite some time. I've also been busy, but some avoidance has taken place of course.

Because I was going to write one after Copenhagen. I'd come back and whilst I was away I'd had a think. I'd concluded that C would never be able to give me the affection that I do desire, because she probably isn't that kind of person.

And this was a good step to take and it made me feel better and prepared to head onwards.

But then somewhere along the way, before I could make that entry, things changed. I slipped back and because I so wanted to post about moving on, I was still going to say as such. But that would be ridiculous to merely try and convince myself of something that's no longer true.

This was not helped by a pub visit. I'd had a shocking couple of days, and indeed original thought C had done her disappearing act as she had failed to respond to a confirmation text. To the point I very almost snapped at her. Fortunately it turns out she'd been without her phone. I feel really bad to have misjudged her and she will have a much longer leash next time. So i went to the pub with a face like thunder and she blew it all away. I came out smiling like a fool. There were many moments when we geeked up, whether it be music, beer or sport and there's just noone else who can offer this. I'm not sure anyone has ever offered me all three. Charlie - beer and music, Peter - Beer and sport, Mike - Music and sport. And lets face it none of these can hold a candle to her looks wise.

So i've fallen again and I can admit it. This is going to be hard work, it'll probably be helped if she starts seeing someone, however much that might not be fun.

Certainly I think she might be interested in Nils a German guy, she'd invited him along to the pub too, a nice enough guy I suppose.

At this pub gathering she invited me along to a friend's Bday party. I went and got mashed. There too she met a Norwegian called Leo. She was in full on flirt mode, she denied it when I joked about it, but for me it was clear. That one was a bit tougher, I suppose because I was trying very much to interact with others at the place.

As for my libido, it's pretty low where anyone else is concerned. It's tough when you have high standards lets say asking for 20-25 out of 30 and you know full well someone has hit that.

But I'm going to have to pick it up sooner or later. Maybe I just need to go out dancing more. I was out at the weekend and there was someone who grabbed a little interest, but in a strange way, she could easily have been highly arrogant, but there was just something about her. I almost approached but she'd disappeared for the latter half of the night. I have no idea if she was even single.

Hit 88mph Marty - The Future????