2012-06-05 - 8:59 p.m.

It's the hope that kills you.

Why do I fall for the ladies with a complete inability to be civil and live up to expectations set by themselves.

'am quite busy next week, but I'll check few things & let u know!'

Why? Why say that? Why not just leave it at 'I'm pretty busy next week, sorry.'?

Why leave an indication of continued interest in meeting up if you are then not actually going to follow it up?

Let alone the exclamation mark. That's the kicker. That's the crosshairs over the gut just before the boot goes in.

I have to admit Busgirl has never given me a great deal of encouragement, but equally there has been no clear matter of disinterest. Then given the occasional moment such as me suggesting a drink on a Saturday, only to find Friday offered instead. The trail is there, barely and she has mentioned she's single before, so it's fair game. All one asks is that someone is fair in return. Give clear answers, non-leading answers if you don't intend to follow through.

I'll put it straight given a suitable chance and 'No' is a valid answer, but instead you get hopes built and then dashed on the rocks.

I like the girl, have done for a long while and a concerted approach from me is never the most direct, but they pretty much always end up in one way. Friends. I'm not a guy women feel like dating. They like that I arrange social events with them invited and will be happy to sit and drink, eat and chat just as two people, but would they date me *shudder* of course not. I'm too nice.

I believe i am not a bad looking chap, a little skinny, slightly large nose, large, but organised teeth. I also believe that I must have a reasonable personality given that I keep a wide range of friends happy with my company. I am even blessed to believe I'm not appalling as a lover, indeed I have recieved compliments from time to time. Of course the 'friends' tag generally gets in the way of proving that.

Yet, I can still list a long list of those that have not seen fit to agree. Granted i have had to turn down friends in the past. Once as i did not fancy her, which i stated. The other with one who is nowadays an internet model, i kid you not, because I was already seeing someone. Still my reasons are given plain as day, and there are certain not times when i let things drag on.

At least if I can get a 'No' from Busgirl then the project can be shelved and I can investigate other avenues, but I am so often a one at a time kind of a guy, that i struggle to move on. Being messed around just pisses me off, because i wouldn't do it to others if i could help it.

Hit 88mph Marty - The Future????